A Tale of Two Grendels

Having savagely torn the wrappings from my freshly minted Creatures program, I hurriedly inserted the CD-ROM into my drive, anxiously awaiting the moment when my long anticipated Norns would fill my screen to overflowing with their irresistible effervescence.

Having hatched several Norns, and having the joy of teaching/raising/mating them, I knew I'd found the perfect computer program.

Until HE showed up!

For there was a dark denizen among my roving band of fuzz-bodies, one who threatened not only their safety,security, and sanity, but their very lives.

His name: GRENDEL

Yes the Grendel, that foul denizen of another plane, ugly and deformed as sin.

Yes the Grendel, that loathsome, disease-ridden harbinger of sad tidings.

And yes, the Grendel, who's very stench has been known to send a Norn running into the night, shrieking 'run Grendel' and 'push dad'.

Helplessly, I watched, as he snuck in, waiting until my attention was on 'me' who was fascinated with the 'bigtoy' that stands next to the 'music' in the area to the left of the honey 'vendor'.

He attacked fifi.

She must have been terrified, seeing this big, hulking brute of an 'animal' come lurching after her, arms flailing, infection seeping from every pore of his body. I still have nightmares about what it must have been like:

'look dat'
'ugghhhh I'm a grndl'
'fifi come'
'greb arggh smrn ooggghh'
'fifi push'
'huu hu hu hu hu huhuhuaaa'
»SLAP!!« 'im a grndl'
'fifi drop'

By the time I got there, fifi was helpless, quivering mass, unable to decide where to go, helpless to fend off this monster's vicious assault.

I dispatched the beast as hurriedly as I could, and thru heroic medical intervention, saved little fifi.....

But she was never the same.

I vowed vengeance, and began researching ways of dealing with the Grendel, wanting nothing more than to extirpate this horrific brute from my world.

And then I read a passage that changed my life.

"...yeah, a friend of mine imported this female Grendel named Greta, and she's really cool. She like CHASES the male Grendel away with her hands up in the air, and everything!!

But what about the Norns??

She's really good with them. 10 minutes after she was imported, she had all the Norns speaking German!!"

Well, this sounded like the answer to a dream!! Not wanting my precious little ones to have to learn a whole new language, I would have to create a female Grendel on my own.

Further research showed me the proper procedure, and soon I had a female Grendel of my own creation in Albia, ready to vanquish the nasty male.

She slapped Nick. Hard.

What????? What is this?? No!! you're not supposed to do that!!!

Viciously, I laid into her, furious at her for betraying me like that.

She moved into a corner and curled up into a little ball. I went to Nick to re-assure him everything would be alright.

Oddly, he recovered enough to tell me everything was alright(in his own little way), and then...

He walked back over to her.

If he had done back-flips over the carrot 'vendor', I could have not been more surprised!!! Shocked into immobility, I watched helplessly, while he walked into the grasp of certain destruction.

He approached the beast, and leaned over it.

Nothing happened.

He reached down to grasp her.

She struck. Not so hard as before.

Snapping out my immobility as he jumped away, I resumes slapping the vixen.

He came back over.

I had to stop slapping, for fear of hurting him.

She gave him a light thwap, then ducked BEHIND him, out of my reach.

It dawned on me then, that they had each found a friend in the other.

Maybe this was going to work after all......

Soon after they began playing together, it happened.

HE returned.

Angry, slavering, and ready to wreak havok, he approached. I held my breath, raptously enthralled by the sight, terrified of what the outcome might be.

Before he had a chance to inflict any damage, she lunged.

.-*@<[ S M A C K ]>@*-.

She sent him a blow that knocked him backward!!!!!

Widly, I cheered her on, as she went back to her friends.

He approached again, giving the nearest little Norn a sound slap.

The female and I converged on him together, connecting at nearly the same time.


He skittered away, dazed from out onslaught.

Nervously, I waited out the next few seconds, watching their every move with breathless anticipation.

He approached again, moving carefully among my little friends.


Just a little tap from the female, as a warning.

Eventually, they all learned to live together, the 2 Grendels slapping the bejeebers out of each other, and playing with the Norns. They have learned much of the Norns vocabulary just by listening in on our sessions, and know all the toys, lifts etc.

Using the Selector Lemon from Alexander Laemmle, I was able to make sure both of the grendels are free of disease, so there's no sickness in Albia, and the inhabitants(so far), have lived care-free since then.